Munster Express Online

The following tribute was paid at the funeral of the late Nicky O’Connor, 47 Marian Terrace, Tramore, who died at Waterford Regional Hospital on September 9th, 2009, following a tragic accident in late July. Aged 41, Nicky was loving partner of Una and devoted father of Aodh, Finn, Dónal, Paddy, Seadh and Peig. He is also survived by his parents Bill and Alice, sisters Mary, Joan and Mags, and brother Pat. The eulogy was delivered by his friend Garrett Wyse as Nicky was about to be laid to rest last Saturday in St Declan’s Cemetery, Riverstown after Requiem Mass in the Church of the Holy Cross, Tramore.

Nicky wasn’t the tallest man in Tramore, but in terms of being a parent, being a friend, being a partner – he was a giant.

Nicky wasn’t the richest man in the Tramore, but in terms of family, friends and love – he had more than any of us.

Nicky left us far too early, the shock is palpable, in his family, amongst his friends, in this town that he made his home – and although his accident happened weeks ago it was no shock that he didn’t leave until the season was over and the four in the row was done and dusted.

I’ll tell you about my Nicky.

The Nicky that would fall through the door of a house on the side of a mountain in Dingle when he was away with his friends. The Nicky that would work a shift as a chef in Tramore, drive through a storm to a campsite where Una and his kids would be camping for the night, change two nappies, cook three meals, drink four large bottles, fall over and get up and do it all over again.

The Nicky that would join the session in Miltown Malbay – and not leave ’til he’d rung the last drop of fun from the evening. He didn’t leave most of us standing – he left us on the floor, laughing.

The Nicky that would regale you with stories of the “mad heads from Slieverue”, and you’d wonder, with that expression on his face, “just how mad did these lads have to be for Nicky to think of them that way?”

The Nicky that would have a child in one arm, food on the cooker, clothes on the line, children on the tennis court, Una at work, and a shelf, nearly finished. A garden full of life’s requirements for fun, an open door and a sprawling table, ready to be filled with food, drink, craic and kids, an open heart to welcome you in, a seat at the table, a place in the fold.

When Nicky came to Tramore, and joined the Dunphy clan, you’d think he’d be swallowed by the size of that family, be overwhelmed by the sheer number if not their character – not Nicky. Nicky’s character came out and will continue to do so, through Aodh, Finn, Dónal, Paidí, Seadh and Peig and through his deep, deep love for Una.

Nicky loved his music – traditional, electronic, folk, punk. You’d hear the kids singing songs that you knew from your own youth, sometimes lyrics slightly warped by youthful interpretation, versions of classics remixed by O’Connors, belted out in the little green people machine, as it trundled round the town.

Nicky was prodigious, prolific, and most definitely productive, whether it was fathering children or finishing the party – he seemed unstoppable – until fate decided otherwise. Death was always going to be the only thing capable of stopping Nicky.

He died as he lived, with his kids, getting something for them to enjoy, out in the air, reaching what was there, what was free for all to take and enjoy, things most people pass by without ever noticing.

We never knew how many was enough with Nicky, from children to songs, from stories to little incidents, never a dull moment in what was a life so full of the essence of what one can be. They say the grass is always greener, but on Nicky’s side it was lush and long, rich and full, stretching and forever growing.

Nicky was a creator – a creator of life, of food, of family, of fun and of a home. He always had bread in the cooker and failing that, dare I say it, a bun in the oven.

I helped build an extension of Nicky and Una’s house, I don’t know what the year was exactly, somewhere around ‘Two Thousand and Paddy’ or possibly ‘Two Thousand and Donal’. That extension is now a laundry room, and above it are more bedrooms for the children that came since – you really never could keep up with Nicky.

Once again, Nicky is ahead of us all, and when we finally follow him, I will be amazed if he does not have many places set, food on the table, drink in the fridge, music blaring, and a smile on his face.

After falling from that Cherry tree, he gave six weeks fighting to stay above ground, one week for each of his beloved children.

Una, the lads and the extended O’Connor family, have much to be proud of here today,

Codladh Samh ma cairde.

 

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