Munster Express Online

To:  HM The Queen

Buckingham Palace

London

Your Majesty, Eilís, a stóir,

Fáilte go dtí Phoblacht na h-Eirinn an bhliain seo chugainn. You will be made most welcome after so long since the last visit in 1904.

Given the economic climate and austerity measures that are likely to be in place next year I can suggest a nice little B&B on the Ross Road in Ferrybank, handy if yer coming of the ferry from Rosslare. If you reach the church you’ve gone too far. Ask anyone for directions. Nice comfortable rooms. You might even get an en-suite if you book early. And they serve White Pudding at the breakfast.

As it will more than likely be in the Spring I would recommend you bring a warm coat that will keep out the showers and the chilly wind.

If you do want to venture out I would recommend a visit to Tramore. To save you the hassle of driving you can get a Kenneally’s bus to town and get the Tramore one from there. I’m not sure if you will qualify for the pensioner’s free travel or not. I am told that Dooley’s is one of the best chippers in Ireland and ‘tis right on the Prom.

If there’s a crowd of you I would recommend a night at Harney’s in Dunhill, usually a Tuesday. If you want grub there you can pre-order ribs and crubeens, the local delicacy and they might, might, I say, have a musician or two in. If in doubt ring me ould fella. But do remember to pre-book the ribs and crubeens.

I forgot to mention as well that if you should venture as far as Harney’s you could be called upon to sing a song or recite a verse or if you wished you could even have a go at an oul’ jig!!! You will always have someone there who would give you a run back to the digs in Ferrybank.

There are so many delights and even highlights in County Waterford. It’s not and hasn’t ever been all about the ‘glass’ but the new crystal glass centre on the Mall is worth a visit. They will pack any purchases you might make and arrange carriage for the goods back to London.

We also have the mountains. However I would not recommend the walk to Mahon Falls as it might be a bit too much of a trek. Younger folk would manage it quite easily.

Best to mix with the plain people rather than to get caught up in protocol and jiggery pokery of politics.

You will also find the price of ‘blaas’ significantly cheaper than Fortnum and Mason. About 4-5 for a Euro. Oh yes, you’d be better off bringing the Euros from the UK as you will be charged if you draw cash from an ATM.

I would also recommend a visit to An Rinn, Ring, and would suggest you learn cúpla focal to try out on the natives of the Gaeltacht. They would get a right kick out of it.

Remember that in a visit, cuairt, (there ya go, yer first word!) to Ireland, and especially Waterford, you will find the locals affable and warm. However the Déise are renowned for their quick-wittedness and to appear almost as if they are taking ’the mick’. ’Tis only all part of the way of life in that part of the ex-empire.

By the way, I’ve checked with the father. He will be available…but you might have to have ‘the lecture’. Take it or leave it!

Is Mise

Seamus de Paor,

Port Mor