Coincidentally, I’m currently three-quarters way through ‘You Cannot Be Serious!’, the somewhat underwhelming title of one of the best books I’ve read in ages.

A study in acerbity by author and ‘London Evening Standard’ columnist Matthew Norman, it’s a run-through of ‘The 101 Most Infuriating Things in Sport’, with precisely that number of short chapters devoted to those with a world-class capacity to piss people off. Separate entries happen to be devoted to Richard and Andy, making the nail-on-head hitlist at numbers 84 and 36 respectively.

Of Keys, an “emblem of blazer-clad corporate loyalty”, a slave to the vendors of the supposed ‘best league in the world’, Norman observed, with accidental foresight, that last Saturday’s faux pas (during which he also poured scorn on “charming” West Ham chairwoman Karen Brady’s newspaper complaints