Just when I thought that words wouldn’t surprise me any more, after I waded through the darling of the academic and texting world of TXTNG the gr* db8 from Oxford University Press doesn’t Wellboy from UpTheDeise hit me with a gr8 Crimbo pressie. For Focal Sake! – A 32 county Guide to Irish Slang.

Begone the Guardian Book of English Language and get your laughing gear around this fair focal of fun. You could be blue mouldy in Carlow for want of Chutties in Donegal. Or be mental in Monaghan where a man is a Horsebox, Clatty is dirty and no doubt daytrippers still sing – Stop the bus we ant a wee-wee. And you could puzzle a Langer in Cork between a Bazz and a right Fla (a good looking person).

My Killinaskully favourite Ludder is there in differing versions from Looder to Lirdraman in Kildare, where a smell on Benjy still lingers. Check on the cabbage in Offaly is Strain de spuds elsewhere. Gallery means a good time in Kilkenny.

To be fair to be foxy the book does have a WARNING that the contents may be offensive or difficult to understand and I can’t see Jonathan Ross or Bussell Brand giving it as a Christmas present to Andrew Sachs. But it is the bad language that gives this book its split-yer-sides laughing effect. Tommy Tiernan won’t be sweatin’ like a dyslexic on Countdown after a few pages of this book.

So, for focal sake go out and buy/feck/rob/scab/half-inch, For Focal Sake!

Wellboy, the author/compiler, is Cian Foley of UpTheDeise Enterprises.