"Out of the mouth of babes...!"
The children were enjoying their first day in ‘big’ school and their teacher asked them to tell the class about something nice they had received recently.
One little girl put up her hand and the teacher said: “OK, Suzie, what have you to tell us?” “Well, Miss,” answered Suzie, “I was really pleased when my Daddy got me a bow-wow.”
“That’s wonderful, Suzie,” said the teacher, “but you’re getting to be a big girl now and you must try not to talk like a baby. Think hard, what was it that your Daddy bought you?” The little girl scrunched up her eyes and suddenly the answer came to her. “My Daddy gave me a dog, Miss, he gave me a little dog.”
Next up was little Johnny who told the class that his Daddy had given him a choo-choo for his birthday and he really liked playing with it.
“Now, Johnny,” said the teacher, “you’re getting to be a big boy and you too must stop talking like a baby. Think again, what was it that your Daddy bought you?” Johnny scratched his head and stuck his finger in his ear and eventually the answer came to him. “I have it Miss.” he said, “what I got was an electric train.”
All the children now had their hands in the air eager to tell the teacher what they had got as presents but she singled out a little girl at the back who was the only one not to raise her hand.
“Marian, have you nothing to tell us? Did you not receive anything nice from anybody”, asked the teacher gently.
“I did but I’d rather not say, Miss”, replied Marian in a quiet voice. “Now come on Marian, don’t be shy and tell us what your got,” said the teacher firmly.
“I got a book I really like from my Granny Miss,” answered the child eventually. “What is it called and, remember now, no baby talk,” said the teacher.
“OK Miss,” said Marian whose face had turned beetroot red, “it’s called Winnie the Shit.”